Infra Man!
Copyright © 1984 by Roger M. Wilcox. All rights reserved.
(writing on this story began August 31, 1984)
Length = 19884 words
"I'm telling you, the planet Caloria is going to explode!"
The Science Council of Twelve wasn't the least bit
impressed. "Really, Jor Heat, do you expect us to believe that?"
"But it's true! Just look at these calculations!"
Jor Heat produced a rolled-up printout. He released one end
of it while holding on to the other, and the paper instantly
unrolled and cascaded across the floor. It was full of dot-matrix
numbers that signified absolutely nothing.
"We . . . um . . . see your calculations, Jor, and
they look . . . er, in order. But the last time we listened to
you, we built a thousand-foot dam for a flood that amounted to two
quarts. And the time before that, half our crops were turned to
Fiberglas because of your 'quick-grow' formula. And the time
before that —"
"Oh, never mind! Just don't come running to me when the
electron degeneracy decays under YOUR feet!" And with that, Jor
Heat stormed out of the Science Council of Twelve building.
The class-A sun shone gloriously down on the flat Calorian
landscape, raising the morning to a cool 130 degrees Farenheit.
The mountains in the distance soared ten feet overhead. The
trees in the nearby park were super-condensed — hundreds of
thousands of times denser than any terrestrial counterparts. The
flowers, bushes, and squirrels were far denser than water, too.
The only thing that didn't have a high density was Calorio
Sapiens, the people.
When Jor arrived at his private laboratory, his assistant
Mor Pay was standing by the front door. "Forgot your key again,
didn't you, Mor?"
"Yeah, how'd you know?"
"Just call it a feeling," Jor replied as he opened the door.
"Say, have you seen my new . . . uh . . . roommate?"
"No. Who is she?"
"He, actually." He switched on the lights, illuminating a
baby that was whimpering in one corner of the room. "Mor Pay,
meet Cal."
"Aw," Mor cooed as he picked up the baby in his arms.
"Little Cal Heat. In't he cute?"
"Not really. Look again."
"Oh," said Mor, inspecting the baby more closely. "I see
what you mean. He is a bit odd-looking for a baby his age.
Who's the mother?"
"I'm not sure. I think her name was La Ra, or Law Rox, or
something like that. Anyway, I didn't know it when we . . . er
. . . 'got together' two years and three months ago, but she and I
had the perfect combinations of recessive traits to produce a
very interesting child."
"How interesting?"
"Glad you asked," said Jor, raising an index finger and
smiling broadly. "Turn around so that Cal is facing that target
over there."
Mor did so, though he couldn't figure why. Jor pushed a
button on the counter he was next to, and a piece of black paper
flopped down over the center of the target. "Okay, Cal," Jor
said in Baby Talk, "Do it! Go to it, show daddy what you can
do!"
Cal Heat wrinkled his forehead in concentration. To the awe
of Mor Pay, two sizzling, bright red beams bridged the gap
between the baby's eyes and the bullseye of the target. The
center of the black piece of paper smouldered for a few seconds,
and then consumed itself in a momentary burst of flame, leaving
Mor flabberghasted.
"Heat vision," Jor replied to his unasked question. "And
that's not all. Two days ago, when I put him on the scale, he
concentrated like he just did, and his weight went down!"
"No kidding! By how much?"
"Nearly one-and-a-half million pounds."
Mor hefted the baby in his arms a bit. "That means he cut
off about three quarters of his weight!"
"Yep. And when he stopped concentrating, his weight jumped
right back up to its normal 2,124,305. I think that might've
been a little trait our ancestors picked up to help them
withstand Caloria's gravity, and his genetic memory of it just
surfaced. There is one detrimental genetic effect he inherited,
though."
"What's that?" asked Mor Pay.
"Don't EVER expose him to iron oxide."
"Rust? Why not?"
"I guess its the special magnetic field of FeO or something,
but ferrous oxide weakens him fatally. He could stop functioning
completely or be crushed under his own weight. He isn't affected
by ferric oxide, or by a 50-50 alloy of ferrous oxide with any
other element, just ferrous oxide."
"A kid that's allergic to rust." Mor wanted to change the
subject: "How's he picking up the language?"
"Pretty well."
"Daddy whacko," Cal Heat said.
"Yep, he's picked up the language perfectly," commented Mor.
Jor grunted at him just as the telescreen lit up. A
disembodied voice wafted through the room.
"Oh no, a news report!" Jor Heat panicked. "This old black
dwarf is even closer to exploding than I figured on!" He ran to
the far side of the room and drew open the drapes. A silvery
missile lay perched on a half-cylindrical launching tube.
"What is THAT?" asked a bewildered Mor Pay.
"That," said Jor, now frantic but still his pseudo-intellectual self,
"Is a prototype interstellar space capsule. What did you think it was?"
"Well, it looked like a —"
"Never mind! Oh, it's no use, I'll never be able to build
an escape rocket for myself in time."
"For YOU?" cried Mor Pay. "What about ME?"
"What ABOUT you?" Jor Heat took baby Cal from Mor's arms
and set him inside the rocket. The ship's hull was as thin and
flimsy as paper. He reached into a desk drawer and pulled out a
little bauble which he placed in the space ship next to Cal.
As Jor went to the side of the room nearest the door, Mor
peeked in at what Jor had just placed in there. It was a ring
with an adjustable band and a green picture of a lantern on the
front.
"What's that ring?" asked Mor Pay.
"It's loaded with carbon. If Cal Heat should ever be
confronted by iron oxide, all he has to do is aim the ring at it
and spray. It'll make it into carbonated iron oxide, which won't
affect him."
'Great,' thought Mor Pay. 'Iron oxide is lethal, but steel
oxide is perfectly harmless.' He noticed an inscription on the
band of the ring.
"What's on the inscription, Jor?"
"Instructions on how to reload the ring."
"Funny, it looks like it says, 'Manufactured by Cracker
Jack'."
Fortunately, Jor Heat found what he'd been looking for, so
he could ignore that comment. He waltzed over to the ship for
the final time, inserted a tape cartridge into the appropriate
slot, closed the hatch, and pushed the "Airlock Closed" button.
"Where are you sending him?" inquired Mor Pay.
"The nearest inhabitable planet. The star system he's
targeted for has planets even larger than Caloria, but they're
not black dwarfs. I had to aim for a terrestrial planet."
"WHAT? You're stranding him on a zilch-density hunk of rock
with no gravitational field?!"
"Practically no gravitational field. Don't worry, he won't
float off into space." Jor Heat inspected the launcher one last time.
"What's on that tape cartridge, anyhow?"
"The native language of the world we're sending him to in
six easy lessons." Finally, Jor ignited the engines. The
capsule thundered into life, quaking the room around them. The
din was almost unbearable as the exhaust glowed with an infra-red
life all its own, leaving brilliant heat patterns on their
retinae.
"WHAT'S THEIR NATIVE LANGUAGE CALLED?" yelled Mor Pay.
"LEBANESE!"
The space craft shuddered away from the gravity field a
hundred thousand times as strong as Earth's. It transposed
itself to hyperlight speed, leaving behind Caloria, a black dwarf
star with days that lasted fifty hours and an orbit and geology
stable enough to keep it alive for hundreds of millions of years.
The tiny craft dropped out of hyperspace three days later,
perfectly targeted on the blue-green third planet of a certain
class G2 star. The tape had been going at ultra-high speed, and
Cal Heat was about to receive his final warning about his new
home from it.
"The inhabitants use a strange system of units called the
Metric system. Instead of pounds and feet and degrees Farenheit
and all the other standard units you're used to, they use
kilograms and meters and degrees Celsius. Due to your genetic
strangeness, you look exactly like the other inhabitants of this
world; which is lucky, since an average Calorian looks different
enough to stand out. But you will still stick out on the planet
Lebanon unless you learn their oddball metric system. Good luck,
my son. Wear your ring in health."
The tape automatically shut off, thanks to super-advanced
Calorian technology, and the space ship plummetted through the
class-M terrestrial's Nitrogen-Oxygen atmosphere. The ship's
paper-thick skin heated to incandescence, re-radiating most of
the heat but unable to keep all of the re-entry heat from getting
inside. Which was just as well, because Cal liked the more
comfortable raised temperature anyway.
Moments later, the space ship crashed down alongside a dirt
road in Infinitessimalville, California. A beat-up old pickup
truck was lucky enough to be driving by, driven by a beat-up old
man chewing on a beat-up old piece of straw who was with his
beat-up old wife. The woman was paying enough attention to the
correct side of the road to hear the tremendous crash. "Look,
Jonathan!" she shouted. "It's an FTL Calorian space ship with a
baby in it!"
"Huh?" Jonathan woke up.
"I say an FTL Calorian space ship with a baby in it just
crash-landed off the road there!"
"Martha, ya gotta quit workin' for that thar space bureau."
"No, I mean it! Stop!"
Jonathan Heat cut the ignition, and the pickup lugged to a
halt from engine compression alone. He opened the door on the
driver's side, lumbered out on worn-out legs, and scraggled over
to the crater. The paper-thin hull of the ship was now only half
as thick as a piece of paper, but it was still intact. He
flipped open the hatch on the top of the craft and was greeted by
a 21-pound baby spurting out "Hello!" in perfect Lebanese.
"AAAH!" he yelped, and jumped back a couple of feet.
"Martha, it's a monster!"
The baby's forehead wrinkled. This man wasn't speaking
Lebanese or Calorian!
"Jonathan Heat," scolded Martha, "You will not speak of this
precious little darling in that way!" She scooped him up in her
arms, negligent of the possibility of radioactive contamination.
"Aw, isn't he cute? Let's adopt him."
"Adopt him?"
"Yes," said Martha deliberately and threateningly. "Adopt
him. . . ."
"<Gulp!> Er, okay, we'll adopt him," Jonathan acquiesced.
"What should we name him?"
"Well, he landed in California, so let's name him Cal."
The baby's eyes perked up.
"Cal Heat!" Martha was, as usual, overjoyed.
At last, some words this baby could recognize! That was his
exact Calorian name. "Hello!" he said in perfect Calorian.
"More baby talk," Jonathan figured.
In order to adopt him, they had to take him down to the
alien orphan adoption agency of Infinitessimalville. "Who are
his original parents?" the airheaded old bat of a receptionist
asked.
"We don't know," replied Martha and Jonathan Heat in chorus.
"Jor Heat," Cal said.
The receptionist was startled, but nevertheless nervously
copied down this name. "Does the child have any allergies?"
"Ferrous oxide," Cal Heat said. He was picking up the new
language rather well; it didn't even use those awful metric
units!
"Okay," the receptionist quavered, "Let's see what he
weighs."
She piked him up by the armpits and set him down on a
Genuine Patented Infinitessimalville Baby Scale. "Twenty-one
pounds," she read.
Cal Heat realized that he was on a scale almost instantly.
He knew what to do on scales: he closed his eyes, wrinkled his
forehead, and started to concentrate.
"No, wait," the receptionist said, "Nineteen pounds. Er,
fifteen pounds."
"Now see here," Jonathan interrupted, "Can't you even read
your own goll-darned scale?"
"Five pounds. . . ."
Less than a second later, the baby began drifting up off the
scale. "Nothing," the airheaded examinist read. "No weight at
all."
She plucked him out of the air and sat him down on a metal
table. "Now then," she rambled, taking out a rubber mallet,
"Let's test your reflexes."
"Uh, I don't think that's such a good idear," Jonathan
suggested, making his one intelligent move for the day.
But the baby was too thrilled right now to be involved in
their discussion. On Caloria, he couldn't even levitate his own
weight; but here, one million five hundred thousand pounds of
levitation force could lift over six hundred thousand kilograms
of mass. Not that he couldn't lift that much himself.
And now, that self-induced lifting force could make him fly.
He decided to take a trip right then. Concentrating once more,
he suspended himself a few feet above the floor, looked down the
nearest hallway, and tilted his front end down. Then, like a
helicopter changing the angle of its rotor, he began to ease
forward.
"There, ya see, Martha? I toldja he was a dag-blamed
monster!"
"Aw, but he's such a sweet little monster."
And so, the Heats adopted the little Calorian monster — er,
baby. As he grew, he worked hard to keep his muscles in shape
with the Calorian norm; in fact, they slightly surpassed it. His
unique genetic makeup also allowed his hide to harden so greatly
that it resisted the cut of a scalpel and the flame of a torch.
He had a tendency to stay in the house during winter with the
heater on full blast, and loved it when their little town
experienced an occasional heat wave.
By the age of eight, he was the only Infinitessimalville boy
his age to speak three fluent languages, though he never used
Calorian in public. It was about this time when he started
reading comic books and indulged himself in the superhero image.
He went into Town that same week and ordered a few yards of
black and red polyester fabric.
And several hours later, the sky was occupied by a boy
wearing a red costume with a black cape and a white outline of
the letter "I" on his chest. Cal Heat would be wearing glasses
with plain, flat lenses on them the next day, but for now the
mysterious stranger that flew over Infinitessimalville was . . .
Infra Boy!!
His infrared vision — one of his few abilities that was
native to Caloria — soon spotted a sign of trouble. A man was
working on his car, an old clunker that had seen better years,
and seemed pretty steamed up over some sort of mess. Infraboy
swooped down to aid him.
"Can I be of any assistance?" he asked as he landed.
"Goddamn jack broke. . . ." The man didn't notice him much.
Infraboy picked up the two pieces of the jack. It had
broken cleanly right in the middle of the lifting rod. He fitted
the top piece to the bulk of the jack, stared at it, and flared
his untrained heat vision into life.
The two red beams intersected on the crack, warming it up
gradually but not heating it to anywhere near a welding
temperature. "Oh well," he said, throwing the jack aside, "Guess
I'll have to work on that."
"Great. Now what am I gonna do about this flat tire?"
"Tell you what; I'll be your jack."
"Huh?"
With one hand, Infra Boy picked up the end of the car that
had the flat.
"Huh?"
"You just said that. Anyway, get to work."
The man decided this wasn't such a bad idea after all, and
started fixing the tire. The kid's super strength bit could wait
'til he got home for his attention.
"Well, thanks," he said when he was through. "Uh, what's
your name?"
"You can just call me . . . Infra Boy!" he
announced as he flew off into the sunset.
Later that night, his infrared vision became even more
useful. He stopped a pair of petty thieves and carried them down
to the police station. A stalled automobile engine required
little more than a Calorian-strength push to get it going again.
He stopped in front of a couple of thugs in a dark alley, asked
them what they thought they were doing, and non-chalantly hauled
them off to police headquarters when they tried to assault him.
And after several hours of careful searching, he even found a cat
stranded up a tree that he could rescue.
When his mother found out that Cal Heat was Infra Boy, she
was overjoyed (of course). His father was a bit more skeptical.
"WHADAYA MEAN YOU'RE A SUPER HERO?! DON'T YOU KNOW YOU
COULD GET HURT????!!!?!?!"
"No, I couldn't get hurt," Cal replied calmly.
"Oh, that's right. Well, in that case, it sounds like a
great idea, go get 'em tiger and all that."
"Sure thing, dad. I think I'd better get to bed now; I have
to sleep for at least eight hours every two days. Calorian days
are 50 hours long, you know. 'Night."
Cal Heat was a strong young boy who grew into a strong young
teenage boy; he could lift about five thousand tons by the time
he was twelve. Of course, he had to conceal this fact behind his
"secret identity," which might not have been more than a
psychological game, but when he took off his outer clothes and
exposed his Infra Boy suit to the world, he could unleash all the
strength and flight and underdeveloped heat vision he wanted.
Normally, wearing the same suit month after month would make
a person stink pretty badly, but that's only because normal
people sweat. For Infra Boy, it was always too cold to sweat.
Cal Heat had started eighth grade when the first change
happened.
He was in the halls before his first class when a voice to
one side of him said, "Hi!" He turned to its source, still
wondering whether he should change his bulky flat glasses in for
some flat contact lenses. There was a girl staring him straight
in the eye.
"My name's Jennifer Lang," she said.
Cal began to feel something almost alien at this point, but
continued. "No relation to —"
"None."
"My name's Cal Heat," he extended his hand, "Pleased to meet
you." When she shook his hand, he realized that human beings and
Calorians might not be that incompatible after all. She was
beautiful! To most outside observers she probably looked about
average, but something about her clicked with him. Nervously, he
let her hand go, hoping she felt the same way about him.
"You can just call me LL, that's what all my friends call
me."
"LL?" Cal inquired. "But your initials are JL."
"You're right, that is a bit confusing. How about if you
just call me Jennifer."
"That sounds like a great idea."
"So," she asked, "What kinds of things are you doing here in school?"
"Oh, the usual. Xeno politics, integral calculus, subatomic
physics, ancient Lebanese culture — that sort of stuff."
"Ooh, sounds hard. What kind of xeno politics are you
taking?"
"Calorian. Why?"
"Oh, I was just thinking of taking Alpha-Centaurian xeno
politics when I get into high school."
"You like xeno politics too?" 'Wow, this girl's a jewel!'
he thought.
"Sure. I think alien cultures could show us how to overcome
all the mistakes we've made."
The bell rang. "Whoops," she said, patting him on the
shoulder. "Gotta go. Bye!"
"Will I see you again?" he asked as she ran away.
"Count on it!" she shouted back, and disappeared down the
hallway.
Cal Heat strolled off to his first period class, swelling
with hope and vivid sexual fantasies about the new girl. It was
too bad he'd have to wait 'til he got home before he could
masturbate; only his hardened steel walls could keep his semen
from blasting on through like buckshot. Then his father would
hear it and say, "When's that kid ever gonna learn the truth
about masturbation?" and his mother would ask, "Why don't you go
in there and stop him, then?" and his father would answer, "Good
point."
Cal Heat and Jennifer Lang were good friends through junior
high, and really good friends on into high school. She had often
inquired about his ring, which he always told her was his ring
from the football team, even though the Infinitessimalville High
football team's emblem looked nothing like a green lantern with a
light-gray-carbon-ash-covered hole in the center. To validate
this claim, he had to try out for the football team year after
year, which he would continually fail to enter just so he could
conceal his Calorian nationality.
Meanwhile, Infraboy's fame had spread nationwide. The white
outline of the letter "I" against a red backdrop was rapidly
becoming a symbol recognized by even the relatively uninformed.
The only two secrets he kept were his true name — Cal Heat —
and the fact that none of his powers worked in the presence of
iron oxide. When exposed to rust, his strength was reduced to
average, and his flight, heat vision, developing super-agility,
and even infrared vision all disappeared. That was why he always
wore his carbonation ring fully loaded.
But in his spare time, it was nice for someone as wimpy as
Cal Heat to have a girlfriend he could talk to or make love with.
It was inevitable that Jennifer and Infraboy should
eventually run into each other. She was walking home from school
one bright Thursday afternoon. Cal Heat usually walked home with
her, but he had deserted her today for some reason. As it turned
out, the local bully, Lecks Badguy, had told Cal to get lost and
avoid that particular route home. When Lecks pushed him down, he
tried to look hurt as best as he could, but it was pretty hard to
keep from laughing.
And now, Lecks was going to give the same treatment to
Jennifer, just because she was Cal's girlfriend.
"Hey, Jenny!" he said sarcastically as he caught up with
her. "Where's your boy-friend?"
"Please, Lecks." Lecks Badguy always got on her nerves, but
this time she had a feeling he'd outdo himself.
"Aw, c'mon, skinny legs! What's got your —" he pushed her
shoulder — "shoulders up?"
She felt trapped. Lecks might have been lowest of the low,
but he was at least three times her size and mostly muscle.
Having Cal there with her wouldn't have made much of a
difference, either; the only thing she could do now was make a
break for it.
Lecks grabbed her arm just as she started to run. "Oh, no
you don't!" He turned her to face him. "You're not going
anyplace. . . ."
Half a second later, he was on his back five feet in front
of her. Cal Heat couldn't go this way today, but Lecks'd made no
provision against Infraboy. "I don't think you're treating this
young lady very nicely."
But Lecks was too pig-headed to give up to some old legend.
"That's none of your business," he said as he got to his feet
and punched the boy in the red tights and black cape right in his
gut.
Infraboy's gut made a hollow noise, and Lecks Badguy's fist
rebounded off it with bruised knuckles. Infraboy put his fists
to his waist and said, "Come on, can't you hit any harder than
that?"
Lecks stepped back and kicked Infraboy in the groin. Even
through his boot's steel tip, his toes suffered the same fate
that his fingers had. Infraboy wasn't entirely unaffected by
that blow, either; his full potential toughness had not yet
developed, and his black external briefs weren't much protection
against a steel toe. Infraboy took a full half second to recover
completely.
That made our hero sore, in both ways. He reached over and
grabbed the flailing Lecks Badguy by the collar, then hurled him
a carefully calculated 157 feet into a grove of bushes. He
clapped the dirt from his hands and turned to Jennifer. "Well,
miss, I hope I didn't interrupt anything."
"Oh, no, Infraboy, you —"
And then their eyes met. He'd been afraid this might happen
for a long time, but now he could only hope that she couldn't see
through his super-heroic machoness.
Her forehead crinkled. 'Oh no,' Infraboy thought. 'This is
it! She knows Cal Heat better than any sentient being anywhere,
and I can feel the vibes going already. . . .'
"You know," she said, "You remind me of my boyfriend."
"Oh, really," he said, completely nervous. "Wh-what's his
name? Maybe I know him."
"I doubt it. He's the scientific — uh, geek — around Infy
Hi. Kinda keeps to himself, avoids trouble, goes out of his way
to look non-muscular. Not like you," she crooned as she felt his
muscle.
He swallowed hard. 'This is even worse,' he thought.
'She's been going with Cal Heat for years and now she's ready to
give him up to the first muscle-bound Calorian in tights she
sees.'
"Of course, he does show an interest in Caloria."
"Oh, really," Infraboy brightened up. "Caloria's my home
'planet,' you know."
"I know, I know, I've read about it hundreds of times. I've
even saved all the newspaper clippings and now — wow! Here I am
talking with the Boy of Heat himself!"
"Well, I must be off now." 'Before you recognize me.'
"But what about," she indicated the bushes, "Lecks Badguy?"
"Don't worry about him," he said, and flew off to where he'd
thrown the unfriendly neighborhood bully. He stood over him
awesomely just as he started to get up.
"If I ever catch you pestering people like that again,"
Infraboy threatened, "I'm gonna use THIS." He stared at the
leaves of the bush next to him, and loosed his heat vision. The
leaves got warm and gave off a little smoke. "Guess I'll have to
work on that. Oh well, I can always use THIS."
He conveniently broke off a branch from a convenient tree
within arms reach, and conveniently turned it to powder. Lecks
Badguy conveniently fainted.
'Well, that was easy,' he thought, took a flying leap, and
flew off into the afternoon sunset.
Cal Heat stared at the temperature resistant titanium target
in his bedroom. Beams of heat vision sprang from his eyes and
struck the bullseye as usual, but they hardly changed its
infrared image. "I've been working on that for weeks now," he
mused, "And I still haven't been able to get my heat vision up to
the point where it really makes a difference."
He had posted a sign below the target on yellow construction
paper. Crayoned in purple on the sign was, "Once you can burn a
hole through the target, your will have mastered your heat
vision." He didn't know if there was an upper limit to his heat
vision's potential power, but he currently felt like he'd already
reached it. What good was a biological ability if it was too
weak to use?
"Ah well," he gave in, "Enough of that. Think I'll go out
on patrol again. It helps me relax and forget my problems."
He grabbed both sides of his button front shirt and pulled
them apart, revealing the characteristic "I" outline on the red
background. One quick-change later, he was out the window and
gaining altitude high above the small town.
Anyone below who saw him pointed, of course, but he couldn't
be sure if it was because he was Infraboy or because he wore
black shorts on the outside of his red tights. Ah, that was
Jennifer down there on Nowhere Lane. He decided to drop down and
say hi.
"Hi," he said as he dropped down.
"Infra Boy," she said, her expression melting to a smile.
"I've been thinking about you ever since you first showed up."
She slid her hands onto his shoulders. "You're really something
else."
"Uh, yeah," he replied. 'Poor Cal Heat,' he thought. 'Now
she has eyes for Infraboy, too. Oh well, maybe two boys for one
girl isn't such a bad setup anyway. Especially if the two are
crammed in the same tights.' "Say, what are you doing tonight?"
"Hopefully going to bed with a Calorian," she said as she
squeezed him.
'Wow, she's really coming on strong! She never acted that
way around Cal Heat — or anyone, for that matter! She acts like
she's known me for weeks.' "I hope you realize that my Calorian
muscles can do serious damage to you if they get out of control."
"I'll take that chance. Come on, let's go to my place."
She grabbed his hand and headed off.
And that night, without her even guessing it, Jennifer Lang
fell in love with the same person for the second time.
Cal Heat glanced distractedly at his watch. 'Where is she?'
he wondered. 'Jennifer was supposed to meet me by the old
warehouse at noon. Wonder what she wants here, anyway.'
He was distracted when he saw two rather burly men come from
around opposite corners of the old building. They wore plaid
flannel shirts and looked like thay hadn't shaved in a week. The
one with the wool cap and axe approached Cal and said, with a
thick French accent, "Where do you think you are going?"
"No place," Cal replied. "I'm just standing here."
"Where do you think you are going?" This jack had probably
only been taught how to say that one line.
"Kukamonga," Cal sneered.
The other lumberjack picked him up by his collar and
belched, with another heavy French accent, "You are not going
anywhere, misseur!"
That shake-up had thrown off Cal's glasses, but these
foreign inbecils probably wouldn't recognize Infraboy anyway.
"Hey," Cal commented, trying to act scared, "Take it easy! Wh-whadaya
want?"
The two lugs didn't answer his wimpish plea, but grabbed
both his arms and pinned him up against the wall of the warehouse
instead. "Honest," Cal whimpered, "I didn't even TOUCH your
daughter!"
Then he heard the muffled cry: "Help!" It came from the far
corner of the warehouse; and he recognized the voice.
"Jennifer!" he yelled. Then louder: "Jennifer!!"
No time to waste, or to think. He flung the two hulks off
his back and onto two separate groups of metal drums about fifty
feet away. He couldn't afford wasting time to change to his
Infraboy clothes; raising his fists above his head, he rammed
them into the warehouse wall, crumbling it into neatly stacked
plywood.
The whole interior of the warehouse, save a room at the far
corner, displayed itself before him. But he wasn't alone;
whoever had set him up had also planned for "just such an
emergency," and six men wearing hit man clothes and carrying
nickel-plated revolvers stepped out from behind various crates.
"There he is, boys! GET HIM!!"
A hail of bullets clouded Cal Heat's speedy entry. One or
two of these actually hit him, and got as far as making holes in
his shirt and polyester undergarments before flattening against
his skin. They caused him momentary annoyance, at best; he was
more worried about getting to Jennifer in time.
He dashed through the crates at full speed — over thirty
miles per hour — constantly looking for openings to shorten the
trip. Occasionally, the fastest route was right through a crate,
and he took it. The rain of bullets slowed to a trickle as the
hit men realized how futile it was, but the few that impacted
slowed him down enough to make this rescue less than likely.
When he was fully two-thirds of the way across the giant room, a
scream — Jennifer's — issued from his destination.
"Jennifer!!" he yelled. He wouldn't get there in time; the
only thing he could hope to do now was burn a hole in the door to
distract Jennifer's assailants. He squinted at the center of the
door, and spat out two red eye beams which converged on a single
point and did little more than sizzle and make the door give off
a little smoke.
Five seconds later, he gave up heat visioning. "Guess I'll
have to work on that," he said, and charged through the door.
"Jennifer!?" he inquired, but there was no one there. Half
the furniture in the small office was demolished, and there was a
big hole in the ceiling, but there was no Jennifer. He fell to
his knees, tears streaming out of his eyes, bent his head down
and cried, "Jennifer!!!" He looked up to the hole in the
ceiling. Her last scream resounded in his thoughts.
"JENNIFEEEEEEEER!!!!!"
He got to his feet, shaking with rage. Spinning half way
around, he smashed down the entire wall separating the office
from the rest of the warehouse. Cringing, the hit men cowered
into a far corner. Cal stomped out through the wreckage and
clawed onto the biggest crate he could find. "I'll kill you," he
mumbled.
He raised the crate high above his head. It weighed several
tons, but that was nothing to a Calorian. "I'LL KILL ALL OF
YOU!"
There wasn't anything the hit men could do. They simply
clustered closer together and backed farther into the corner.
Cal Heat looked at their quivering, frightened faces,
wrinkled his forehead, and dropped the crate in disgust. He just
couldn't bring himself to kill those people, no matter how much
he wanted to. He buried his face in his hands and cried
"Jennifer!" once more, before her presence left his life for
good.
Infraboy soon gave way to Inframan, his powers maturing with
his name. Despite all his training in Calorian politics,
calculus, subatomics, and Lebanese, Cal Heat became a struggling
reporter working for the Daily Planetary Bugle, a big-time
newspaper run by Perry W. Jameson. He had some oddball idea that
working on a newspaper would keep him better informed of events
that Inframan could help out on, but all it really did was change
his lifestyle from so-so to lousy. Reporters never earned large
payrolls. He hadn't even seen Lecks Badguy around since his days
as Infraboy.
His strength had increased since his youth; he could lift
ten thousand tons if he tried, and was probably capable of
lifting even more. His speed and agility also increased to the
point where he could run forty-five miles per hour and react
three times faster than most people. His top flight speed had
also increased to 2000 miles per hour (although he had severe
problems breathing if he went supersonic), during which he could
now carry as much as he could normally lift. His skin even
became tougher and harder to pierce. Of course, none of these
changes came without his working on them like crazy.
But the thing he worked his hardest at, more than all of his
other efforts combined, was his heat vision. He owed the loss of
Jennifer to his faulty heat vision, and felt obliged to keep that
circumstance from ever happening again.
Jennifer's memory left a big gap in his life. He was never
sure what happened to her, though she was probably dead. He'd
thought about joining the French foreign legion, but easy work
would only intensify the loss.
There was one more change in him, though it was far from
personal. The I on his chest was sensitive to when he was under
strain — like a mood ring — and shimmered (sometimes shined) as
brightly as he exerted himself.
On the other side of the void between Earth and Caloria,
though, things weren't as progressive.
Lecks Badguy lay suspended in a gravitational field only twice as
strong as Earth's. He needed the excercise a high-gravity environment
would give him, but direct exposure to Caloria's gravity would flatten him into
a bloody pulp. Jennifer Lang lay in the Null Gravity part of his Calorian
Travelling Contraption, held in a kind of dreamy waking state by Lecks' own
Animation Suspending Gas.
For years he'd been roaming the planet's surface in search
of SOMEONE who was renegade enough to want to take over Earth,
either because or in spite of Jor Heat's son. The Science
Council of Twelve, his first contact, wanted to buy the plans for
the ship he was roaming Caloria in but had no interest in taking
over other worlds or getting even for what Jor Heat had done to —
er, for them. He tried to capture Jor Heat and Make Him Talk,
but that proved an abysmal failure because he'd underestimated
the physical strength of someone who'd lived in a hundred
thousand Gs all his life (even though Jor was relatively a
weakling). He went to Jor's lab assistant, Mor Pay, and to Jor's
lover, Law Rox, but both were now multi-million credit
ultradense-oil refinery owners and didn't care about Jor Heat or
his abandoned son.
He even went to Joe's Bar and Blast Furnace to ask around,
but all he got there was funny looks because his Calorian rover
was thirty feet wide, and beer at room temperature. And room
temperature on Caloria was 140 degrees.
He was about to give up looking for subordinates for his
world conquest plans when he happened upon the Calorian
Penetentiary for Ex-Science-Council-of-Twelve-Members-Hating
Criminals Who Want to Take Over Other Planets. This was just
what he was looking for; maybe someday the Calorians would have
insight enough to invent the yellow pages. He disguised his
ten-metric-ton 30-foot-long Caloria Rover as a terrestrial laundry
truck and easily infiltrated the complex.
"Terrestrial laundry," he said to the guard.
"Pass," the guard replied, and let him in.
Once inside, he ducked around a corner, shucked his vehicle's ingenious
disguise, and barrelled on inward toward the Maximum Security Wing for
Ex-Science-Council-of-Twelve-Members-Hating Criminals Who Really Really Want to
Take Over Other Planets but Need an Intellectual Leader With a Space Ship That
Can Achieve Calorian Escape Velocity. Only one of the guards in his path
thought this would be a good time to sound the alarm, but she got run over
before she could reach it and ended up looking like the aftermath of a
steamroller scene out of a Warner Brothers cartoon.
Most of the cells he passed contained single occupants,
although a few of the maximum security prisoners had their pets
in with them. It was when he reached a cell occupied by THREE
prisoners, one of whom was chlorophyll-colored, that he slammed
on the brakes.
Five seconds later, the massive craft screeched to a halt
and backed up to the triple-occupant cell it had passed.
Lecks leaned his head out the window (while keeping it
inside, of course, which was not easy). "Pardon me," his
autotranslator said in perfect Calorian, "But could you help out
a fellow American who's down on his luck?"
"Hit the road!" one of them replied.
"No, wait!" their leader whispered. He huddled them all
into a corner and spoke to them almost inaudibly: "This guy's got
a machine that could mean our escape from this electron-degeneracyball.
If we could trick him out into the open, we could —"
"You'll trick no one!" Lecks Badguy said, after having
monitored their conversation with his Rover's built-in hear-a-rama.
"H-how could you hear us?"
"I'm from Earth! I have super hearing," he lied.
"Earth? That zilch-density dirt node that our arch enemy
Jor Heat once mistakenly named 'Lebanon?'"
"That's the one!" Lecks responded. "And since you hate Jor
Heat, I have a little surprise waiting if you help me conquer the
Earth."
"What's that?" the green one asked.
"Remember 20-some years ago when Jor Heat sent his son to
'Lebanon?' Well, Cal Heat is still alive."
All three of them grabbed the bars. "The son of Jor Heat?
Alive?"
"That's what I just said, isn't it?!"
"Great!" their leader said. "When do we escape?"
"Right now, if you'd like. Just rip those bars apart. Go
ahead, I'm watching you."
The leader rolled his eyes back. "Stupid terran, look at
your bond structure analyzer! These bars are made of Calorium,
the strongest alloy known to Caloriakind."
"Hmmm . . ." Lecks hmmmed as he studied his bond structure
analyzer's display. "You're right, you could never bend these,
even with a hundred thousand times Earth normal strength.
However, there's one flaw you failed to notice; your Calorium
seems to have a rather low melting point."
He swung his Lecks Badguy High-Efficiency Infrared Laser
(patent applied for) into place, and fired. The beam traced the
bottom of the cell, sheared the bars at their bases, and then
went back and cut the bars off again from the top. The front of
the cell fell away.
The green one was ecstatic. The third one wasn't doing a
very good job of containing himself either. The leader smiled
and said, "I think I could get to like you, . . . uh . . .
what did you say your name was?"
"I didn't say what my name was," Lecks answered.
"Well, then what is it?"
"Peter Pan," Lecks replied out of instinct. "But you can
just call me Lecks Badguy. Hop in."
Fortunately, Lecks had built the Calorian Rover to withstand
sudden changes in the forces directed at it; however, he sternly
warned the Calorian criminals never to literally hop into his
craft again after they created 6.5 quakes on their way to the
140-Farenheit high-gravity section.
"Now that you know my name," he said to the Calorians as he
caused the artificial G-forces on the craft's superstructure to
increase from -100,000 to -100,002, "Let's hear yours." He
glanced smilingly at the suspension chamber in which Jennifer was
stored. She scowled as well as she could manage through her
grog.
"I'm called Leader One," the leader said.
"Wasn't he on the GoB . . . aw, never mind."
"My name's extra," the other non-green one said.
"Extra?" Lecks asked.
"Yeah," put in Leader One, "He's just a minor character."
"Hm. And who are you, O chlorophillous one?"
"Rrrrgh," he said, working what amounted to his vocal chords
into order. "Don't have a name, really. They just call me
Plant."
"All right," Lecks said, "Leader One, Extra, and Plant. The
one we're after is Infra Boy, more commonly known to you as Cal
Heat."
Jennifer Lang snapped to attention.
"Cal Heat . . ." Lecks pondered. "Seems I remember that
name from someone els— oh yes! The wimp at Infinitessimalville
High. I wonder if they could be the same . . . nah."
The craft finished leaving the atmosphere and began to
lengthen; Lecks was engaging the Space Warper. At full power,
the distance from Caloria to Sol/Earth would be a couple of
light-days from the craft's point of view, a journey it could
easily make in a week. Of course, the planets and stars to
either side of him would look really squished, but that didn't
matter because his Cray-improved-by-Lecks tactical/nav computer
took that into account.