Welcome to the Wozny home page.  You are the th access!

We are residents of Parma, Ohio (near Cleveland), famous for:
Pink flamingos


White Socks

And Pierogis

Thank you for making this page such a Web-Wide
Success (my humble efforts are hardly worth the acclaim and I grovel at your shoetops in selfless gratitude)! Special thanks to the Parma Sun Post LIVING section for awarding this page an A for Worth Visiting and an A- for Visuals on 2/6/97!

Time and a few dollars well spent have permitted me to embark on a genuine, official family tree project using Family Tree Maker. See the entire spectacle going back to the 1700s in some cases (be sure to take the link for the REPORT). And Be Patient...Family Tree Maker uses Java to draw a family tree on your screen which allegedly you can navigate (but not in an eyeblink).

CLICK HERE to leap into the official Family Tree!

Click here for a direct shortcut to my Wozny photo family tree!

Visit a small and growing gallery of visual family trees on the web which the Sultan is honored to be part of (Click the picture to view the gallery):

Your patience has been rewarded! Antique photo buffs, take a gander of a new collection of Northern Ohio memorabilia (1934-1948). Your hometown could be here!

The history of my family includes a paradoxical connection with Houtzdale, Pennsylvania, a mining town which was the first stop in the US for many Eastern European (i.e., Polish or said-to-be Polish) immigrants. Recent updates indicate these are relatives of my grandmother Anna Oszczypko Wozny (the Dombrowskis and Trojanowskis) and soon I will be posting the complete story (thanks to much help from a local reporter!) Join the search for my roots here.
Drop in for an unauthorized tour of the West Side of Cleveland.

And for a rundown on my hometown of Parma, Ohio, and a photo-journey to the heart of Cleveland (Euclid Beach), click away!

The Sultan opens up his vast holdings of 50-90 year old 78 RPM records! Edison himself would really have to ponder why anyone living in 1997 would attempt to capture, in digital form, some of the worse fidelity humankind has ever wrought. But audiophiles will agree, there was nothing like vinyl (or in some cases shellac or wax) for putting you there with the music and capturing the warmth and ambience of the performance (let alone the sound waves). Click here for a small assortment of RealAudio clips of digitally purified (and pureed) old recordings. Check back periodically...might be worth bookmarking this site...plenty of source material exists for me to publish as my limited time permits!

The International Fraternity of People Named Wozny (IFOPNW), of which I am the sole present director and remaining co-founder, has spared every expense in bringing to you a complete list of every individual named Wozny presently reachable by a major search engine on the Web (as of 7/1/96). Yes, imagine our namesakes, evolving from their tiny villages in (wherever) and stumbling into the computer age. This is better than genealogy in that we have for the first time a self-organizing network of presumably unrelated individuals who will probably converge on this site (over time) to discover their connections to each other! Go see them now...pictures, anecdotes, even Big Fish stories...even connections to the senates of two nations. Woznys everywhere!
Here's the obligatory list of my current favorite Web Sites...do check it out!
The Sultan of Consultin' has accepted a prestigious appointment as Consul-General for two important and nearby micronations ('Llome and Clobstovfia). Do drop by, but before you do, fasten your cybersafety harness, and make sure you have on a fresh Depends, for you may find yourself laughing just a bit. Hey, this is serious stuff (or so these folks that commissioned the homepage tell me). Well, anyway it is certainly a unique and refreshingly uncommon travelogue, a story needing to be told...but please don't blame the messenger.

A nice dry (but cold) Halloween in Cleveland leads to new pix of Brian Kim in his tasteless and inappropriate oriental costume. Diabetics may want to tune out as he gorges on a Kit Kat! (hey Judy, these are the pix!)

For more pictures of the little guy, click here!
A newly acquired scanner allows me to publish samples from my collection of unusual old books.  To whit, a very strange book full of creepy looking engravings, Lavater's Essays on Physiognomy.  Click here, you'll like it!

More strange old books.  Please let me confess something.  I hate to read.  However, I like to look at pictures.  The more unusual, the better.  So I present to all webcrawlers images from two more old books:  Phrenological Journal and McGuffey's Fifth Reader. Yes, only the Woz would resurrect McGuffey's Reader in Cyberspace.  Of course, I will skip over the text and show the parts kids of three generations ago really liked...the pictures.

Another volume in my small collection of arcana.  Cruikshank's Comic Almanack for the years 1835-1843.  An English publication containing the best wit of the day, along with scores of comic engravings, which you can study by clicking here!

Genealogy of the Wozny surname and My Family Tree - this surname, which may be from the area of Poland once known as Silesia, or perhaps Galicia, is quite uncommon.  But it appears in odd little clusters across the globe, such as: Saskatchewan, Chicago, Long Island, New Jersey, San Francisco Bay Area, England, Pittsburgh, Holland, Western Canada, Germany (and of course, Poland) amongst others.  If you bear the Wozny surname, I'd like to hear from you.  A namesake in England and I are forming the not very serious and not very official International Fraternity of People Named Wozny (IFOPNW).  The privileges of membership are few, and the honor is dubious, but you may end up getting a lot of Email from remote corners of the globe
The Prisoner - TV Series - I have conclusive proof that Nr. 6 was really Nr. 1.  This ought to end all the discussions once and for all.  But that would be telling!

Fractals - by day, I am the Sultan of Consultin' for a financial institution so impressive that if I named it, you would bow before your monitor in reverence.  By virtue of over-exposure to PC hardware/software, and a muscular mathematical upbringing, by day I develop client/server software and for the remaining 24 hours I speculate that all natural processes are fractal, and based upon bifurcation.  But of course, I can create another universe based upon trifurcation...here are some of the images produced by my fractal explorer (Julia sets of a 3rd degree polynomial I have named the WozSet):

Fractal Faces (profiles)  To see more fractal and irrelevant images

Twelve Tone Music - I most certainly enjoy the music of Alban Berg and Arnold Schoenberg along with the more recent practitioners of this highly dissonant technique

Powerbuilder - the premier development tool for client/server applications, and a dandy way to get every kind of GPF there is.

As your reward for taking the time to download this page, I offer you a complete explanation of everything

View of the Sultan of Consultin' from below.

Copyright - 2000 - BSW Enterprises and Fourhead Productions, a subsidiary of The IpsoFactory, Inc.

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